On why small groups are helpful to a Christain walk

Well to be honest I wanted to write this as an academic essay and then present in ASL along with a PowerPoint but I think a blog entry will do. Ehem, moving along here, I've been apart of FUSION for almost nine months now, give or take a few days, hours, minutes, etc. And with that I've probably been apart of the girl's small group for about half of that time give or take again.

And well to continue with explaining my title, I've never really understood what a small group was until I got into this one. I mean growing up in the church and thus the youth programs, I knew what small group was. It was suppose to be a place where you got to know the people around you and in turn they got to know you. You pray for each other, helpeach other through tough times and love each other. In theory at least. For me, sadly, I never really go that connection with my peers. Partially because I wanted relationships that didn't deal with high school jokes that I didn't get and the other part is I didn't really know how to let the real me be known by people just yet. Well I'm still learning that but I'm better than I use to be....I think.... ^_^;

But with my small group now, its such a blessing to be apart of. I love being apart of the girls lives and learning more about them each time they share. Its a beautiful thing to see them as they are and where their hearts lie when they speak. At the same time though I still get freaked out by the group still. I remember the fear I felt the first time I went and the verbal spar (it was fun being devil's advocate *shrug*) I used as a way of defending myself from people trying to get to know me. To be honest I still use a lot of sarcasm and wit to throw people off. It's a little less than I use to do though, so progress : D

But slowly, bit by painful bit of bricks my walls are slowly tumbling down and leaving me uncovered to this community that God has placed me in. It freaks me out. Not gonna lie, there are moments where I don't know what everyone is thinking and that scares me. Like when I shared my story or how I shared tonight about my doubts. There were questions that made me want to pretend to get a call and go home but at the same time, growth most come at some sort of cost and it is most often pain.

This community I am in, with their questions, love, and prayers with different personalities belonging to a uniquely formed and beautiful woman of God, each of them teach me something every time we met. I'm learning from them lessons that I would've never thought of and challenges I would otherwise avoid like the plague itself. The Bible says that when we get into community our faith is strengthened. That things that are daunting and strength draining get lighter when they are shared.

Basically its like our church preaches, if you aren't in a small group we aren't living up to our full potential. Human beings are herd creatures, we seek out companionship and community, even if it seems like we don't. And in a small group, you will be challenged to grow in ways that are uncomfortable and hurt, but it's worth it. Or so I am being taught.

In the end I know I am blessed by my small group and I feel like the more involved in the group I become the more my walk will be strengthened and challenged : ) And that is the most beautiful thing about being in community I think : )